Homeland Security and My Alternate Life

I don’t think I ever told anybody this story.

Sometime towards the tail end of 2008, I was getting restless and well, bored , when I stumbled upon a “work abroad” site that had an opening for a “copywriter” to be based in the UAE.

Moving to an Arab country, at that time, to me, sounded absurd and dangerous yet strangely appealing.  Dubai, of course was being hyped as this city of big easy money, extreme luxury, and endless job openings. Still our people had their doubts about Dubai and it wasn’t exactly what one would consider “cool”.

Anyway, I clicked on the link and soon enough I found myself walking into one of them old recruitment agencies in Manila, the type that are always packed with applicants, with wooden floors that creaked and rooms that smelled like old forgotten cigarettes.

I looked around, most of the people were either out of jobs or in this quest for their dream to “work abroad” and provide for their families.  The first thought in my head was guilt. There I was, young, single with a stable career in what many would actually consider a dream job, I really shouldn't be there. It didn’t seem right to hoard opportunities, at least that how I felt initially and then I reminded myself that the Philippines is a democratic-equal opportunity- country and I was after a specific copywriter job that, given this dingy hole in the wall, I’m pretty sure not many copywriters worth their salt would consider. I would say there wasn’t exactly competition.

So we waited, for like a half day, for the so-called “Principal”, the much revered foreign recruiter who flew all the way to do a 3-minute interview with each of us lucky participants of the job lottery.

I was expecting some Arab guy to meet me, but when I was finally called into the interrogation room, I was surprised to find an Indian Lady. She handed me her card. I did a mental note to research this company online.  She told me she belonged to a group of companies that had a growing ad agency in the Middle East, and that they were looking a copywriter.  Predictably, it ended with “we will get in touch with you.”

I thought that was the end of it. I was somehow relieved that it didn’t go the next level, because the truth is, I wasn’t really ready to rock the boat just yet.  Then it happened, I got the call that said I passed the first round and that they will be needing me to fill out a “copy test ”.

This is where it becomes interesting.  So I got the copy test on email, and the test was to come up with a Press Release for ….well, of all things.... an upcoming HOMELAND SECURITY expo.



The reference material was for something like this.



See, I did have some experience writing Press releases for expos because in my first ever job I was writing a lot of them for the annual Travel Tour Expo, but Homeland Security -  in the Middle East -  is maybe something that is not up my alley.  I looked at the reference material, and it was indeed a brochure intended for just about any country’s Department of Defense or your regular terrorist-next-door guy, depending on how you look at it.

Despite my apprehension, I did honestly think about what to write for the next couple of days.  I tried to imagine the audience for the PR, images of military men, the secret service, arab leaders, war and terrorist attacks slowly trickled in and I finally decided that staying for the next Twilight soundtrack launch and writing radio scripts for Josh Groban might just be for the best.

I don’t recall telling anybody (especially my parents) the story, because it just seemed like the kind of thing that you keep to yourself. I eventually managed to land a job in Dubai, but nothing as deeply unsettling  and as undeniably interesting as that first overseas job offer.

I was a sheltered little girl who believed in peace and in a perfect world of pop records and movie franchises. Maybe if I knew then what I know now,  I would have grabbed the opportunity. I guess today I’ll have to be content in thinking that somewhere in a parallel universe, I am receiving Homeland security brochures, working on press kits for the latest military tech, sending out invites to some rocket launch and handling inquiries from the CIA…..

Ok, I know, I should probably stop watching Homeland.



Isn't it ironic? Don't you think?



 

Ps. I am not able to access my old yahoo account (where the copy test has been sent) for over a year now. Suffice to say, the said email account has been “compromised.”